Our adoption story began before our first child was born. Before him I had an ectopic pregnancy which resulted in emergency surgery. Then 18 mos later we were so excited to bring my son into this world. They told us during his pregnancy that he would probably never walk as he had spina bifida. Stupid test. He didn’t and he’s perfect and I never had that test again. It wouldn’t have changed anything had he had SB so why have the test.
Anyway, then we wanted another child. So we began ttc (trying to conceive) again. Shot after shot after shot was given to me by my hubby. We had 4 subsequent miscarriages after that pregnancy which resulted in another 3 surgeries. Finally we became pregnant with Noah. He was, by far, the worst pregnancy. I was on bedrest from 12 wks on because of a cervix that had decided it didn’t need to close. At 16 weeks I had surgery that effectively sewed it shut so that little Noah would stay in where he was safe and cozy. At 36 weeks I noticed I was bleeding heavily so back to the hospital we went. We were so scared to find out if Noah was ok or not. It turns out he was and all that lovely scar tissue I had from all those surgeries had ripped in half (thus the bleeding). He was fine. A week later he was born during a flood. No, really it was raining so hard the dr had a hard time getting to us. Aptly named, no? When he was born he had a fever and had to be rushed to NICU and put on an antibiotic drip. He was fine after that nice little scare. A perfect little baby in every way and so loved by his parents.
During this time of many multiple miscarriages I began to feel that maybe we weren’t supposed to be having children. There are many children that need loving homes. After much prayer we began our adoption homestudy. We had our homestudy done for a year before we finally decided what country to go with. We had originally thought Russia. But then we felt led to Korea. We chose our little A.G. after much prayer and input from family. She’s perfect. By Korean standards she wasn’t considered perfect. But she was perfect for us. She had bells palsy when she was born which did correct itself. Then she had a strawberry on the back of her neck/head which has faded and is covered by hair. Our perfect little girl came from a wonderful couple who could not afford to keep her. A young lady and man who fell pregnant way too young. She has blessed our lives beyond measure. She may not have been born out of my body but she was definitely born in our hearts. A spoiled rotten princess diva is what we have now. She is loved! We are the lucky ones who get to parent her not the other way around.
She is learning about adoption as we go. We’ve never kept from her that she was adopted. We have a scrapbook with pictures of her foster mom and she loves to look at it. We talk to strangers non stop about where she was adopted from. I’ve actually gotten to the point I want to say she’s from Tennessee!!!!! I know they are just interested but it constantly points out that she’s not ours when she is. She told her little friend that she was adopted and her friend came tattling on her. “A. said she’s adopted.” (said in best bill cosby voice whining as a child) It was so funny. We responded yes she was. There was shock on her face. It was precious that it never occurred to her that we look different. All she knew was that this was her friend. I loved that moment. It was so precious.
I hope and pray that by the time she is 18 Korea will have a birth mother registry so that if A. wants to she can find her mom and dad. We didn’t visit Korea when she was brought to us. But when she’s older we’d love to take her to her birth country. We could technically also say she’s from Detroit as that’s where we flew to pick her up at. Regardless she is simply our daughter. We are blessed!